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MyScott95
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PostSubject: Re: Blueeyed   August 24th 2011, 11:48 am

blueeyed wrote:
well layed my son to read today. I'm not sure what I'm feeling. Sad beyond anything i could imagine, but proud at how many, many people loved him. I don't kown how I am going to get threw the days without him, but somehhow I will have to learn a new life.

I want to thank you all for your kind words and advise and will keep them in my heart.

Hi blueyed, it's been 15 years since I lost my oldest son Scott and I really do feel your pain and my heart is with you. If there is any way I can help please PM me. I am still overwhelmed after all these years by those who still reach out to me because he was so loved. I have learned to appreciate the time I was given with my son more and more every year knowing he was loved and made an impact on others lives to this day and has a place in many hearts.

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PostSubject: Re: Blueeyed   August 24th 2011, 3:44 pm

blueeyed...I am so sorry for your loss. You will continue to be in my thoughts and prayers.
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PostSubject: Re: Blueeyed   August 24th 2011, 10:10 pm

I am continuing to pray for you and your family. Please know I am here for you.
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PostSubject: Re: Blueeyed   August 25th 2011, 1:08 am

Blueeyed, my continued thoughts and prayers for you. Hug wrap up in arms

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PostSubject: Re: Blueeyed   August 25th 2011, 7:42 pm

Blue I do hope when you are ready you will post more about your son, I would love to hear about him- what he was like, things he did, who he was. and that goes for all the members here that have lost a child. I cannot imagine what that must feel like, but I would guess that part of the healing process would be to continue to keep them alive by talking about who they were and how they impacted those around them while they were here. I know that my parents found that essential when we as a family lost my brother. I for one would love to hear about him when and if you feel like sharing and I bet other AABB-ers would too.

Sending you and all those members that have lost a child the best of thoughts

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PostSubject: Re: Blueeyed   August 25th 2011, 7:46 pm

Blueeyed, sending love.
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PostSubject: Re: Blueeyed   August 25th 2011, 8:02 pm

RealityRealmer wrote:
Blue I do hope when you are ready you will post more about your son, I would love to hear about him- what he was like, things he did, who he was. and that goes for all the members here that have lost a child. I cannot imagine what that must feel like, but I would guess that part of the healing process would be to continue to keep them alive by talking about who they were and how they impacted those around them while they were here. I know that my parents found that essential when we as a family lost my brother. I for one would love to hear about him when and if you feel like sharing and I bet other AABB-ers would too.

Sending you and all those members that have lost a child the best of thoughts

That's a wonderful idea!! I am always happy to talk about the most important person in my life. Brian will always be in my life and when people are talking about babies or school or other family events, I usually have a "Brian story" to tell.

I would love to share him with you all and I hope blue feels the same way.
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PostSubject: Re: Blueeyed   August 25th 2011, 8:07 pm

Kelli, we would love to hear about Brian. And all of you who have lost children. Please share anytime you choose.
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PostSubject: Re: Blueeyed   August 26th 2011, 12:56 am

I remember one time when we were in Janelle's chat, Kelli, and we posted pics of our kids and talked about them. I would love to hear more about Brian, Scott, and Blue's and sweetpea's sons if they feel like sharing.



Obviously Brian liked playing football. Seems like I remember that he liked music too?

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PostSubject: Re: Blueeyed   August 26th 2011, 5:05 am

gluedtothepc wrote:
I remember one time when we were in Janelle's chat, Kelli, and we posted pics of our kids and talked about them. I would love to hear more about Brian, Scott, and Blue's and sweetpea's sons if they feel like sharing.



Obviously Brian liked playing football. Seems like I remember that he liked music too?



I would love to hear more about them. I post a little as I can when I post here, not because I don't care but because I just don't know what to say to someone who has lost a child. This loss is just so unimaginable to me. I just don't know anything.

but for all of you, your strength humbles me.

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PostSubject: Re: Blueeyed   August 26th 2011, 5:49 am

RealityRealmer wrote:
Blue I do hope when you are ready you will post more about your son, I would love to hear about him- what he was like, things he did, who he was. and that goes for all the members here that have lost a child. I cannot imagine what that must feel like, but I would guess that part of the healing process would be to continue to keep them alive by talking about who they were and how they impacted those around them while they were here. I know that my parents found that essential when we as a family lost my brother. I for one would love to hear about him when and if you feel like sharing and I bet other AABB-ers would too.

Sending you and all those members that have lost a child the best of thoughts

I am afraid to say the wrong thing because I don't want to add to your hurt. I want you to know that I think about you every day, and and glad we have posters likes RR who have words and aren't afraid to express them. Add me to the list of people that are eager to hear all about your son (of course when and If you want to). When I see your thread, all my frustration and animosity over Big Brother is out the window and my heart and mind are open.
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PostSubject: Re: Blueeyed   August 26th 2011, 8:35 am

Blueeyed, I've been thinking of you ever since we heard your devastating news. I've never know the loss and pain you are experiencing but my sister has and I know the pain, rage, loss and numbness that overwhelm you at times can seem unbearable.
I would love to hear about your son when you feel up to sharing him with us.
I wish you strength. He will always be remembered by those who loved him.
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KelliM
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PostSubject: Re: Blueeyed   August 26th 2011, 10:39 am

[quote]
gluedtothepc wrote:
I remember one time when we were in Janelle's chat, Kelli, and we posted pics of our kids and talked about them. I would love to hear more about Brian, Scott, and Blue's and sweetpea's sons if they feel like sharing.



Obviously Brian liked playing football. Seems like I remember that he liked music too?[/quote

Thanks Glued. Brian was in a metal band. In fact, I posted a video of him playing drums, in the metal thread. He was also a wonderful soccer player.

Here's a funny Brian story: Brian was NOT shy and he had a very outgoing personality. Most people "got him" and loved him for it, but some just couldn't tolerate his unwillingness to conform. lol That held true with many of his soccer coaches. Most coaches in the league wanted Brian on their team and he was usually a first round pick. but they also knew Brian was not easy to coach and he had a crazy mother on the sidelines during games and practices lol.

Anyway, a certain coach in the league would get so frustrated with Brian, that he would make Brian run the entire outskirts of the soccer fields. Somedays, Brian would just be running laps rather than practicing. lol After the first year, they named it "Brian's Trail".

Brian would also get the craziest looking soccer shoes each season. Coaches would say they could always tell where Brian was in a crowd because his shoes stood out a mile. They were usually flourescent colors or tie dyed.

The tie dyed shoes were for indoor soccer so they had flat bottoms. He wore them to prom one year. LOL Crazy kid. Those shoes are still with him as I had them buried with him.

Another funny story that lots of kids remember. One year, I bought Brian a cat in the hat costume. It was just a cotton costume that you put over your clothes. It came with shoes and a tall hat. Well, Brian would wear that costume to school. LOL They wouldn't let him wear the hat or shoes, but they couldn't say too much about the costume. One of his friends remembers Brian coming down her street in the costume and riding his skateboard. He was swinging the tail on the costume. LOL



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KelliM
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PostSubject: Re: Blueeyed   August 26th 2011, 10:44 am

Oh, and I might mention that he wore the Cat in the Hat costume to HIGH SCHOOL!!! This was not elementary school. lol!
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PostSubject: Re: Blueeyed   August 26th 2011, 10:44 am

LOL Kelli that's a great story about Brian...I love hearing stories about families and what's more important than our children.
My heart breaks for you moms out there that have gone threw this, MyScott, Kelli, Blue and others that have lost their children. You all are in my prayers daily!

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PostSubject: Re: Blueeyed   August 26th 2011, 10:47 am

And Blue, I'm looking forward to talking to you this weekend!!! I hope your days keep getting a little easier to bear.

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PostSubject: Re: Blueeyed   August 26th 2011, 10:48 am

Kelli, what great stories. He sounds like a wonderfully delightful child.
Thank you, I loved hearing about him.
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PostSubject: Re: Blueeyed   August 26th 2011, 12:23 pm

Thanks for sharing about Brian, Kelli. He sounds like has was an awesome guy!

Blue, I'm in the same boat as the people who think about you all the time, but just don't know what to say or how to say it in this thread.
Hug wrap up in arms

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PostSubject: Re: Blueeyed   August 26th 2011, 12:29 pm

Oh Kelli Brian sounds like was an exceptional young man!

I also think of you often Blue.
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PostSubject: Re: Blueeyed   August 26th 2011, 12:36 pm

Kelli, Brian sounds like so much fun and one of those people who light up a room.

Love the Cat in Hat costume and I have such a visual!
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PostSubject: Re: Blueeyed   August 26th 2011, 12:40 pm

Aw, thanks for sharing Kelli. He sounds like a fun and unique kid.
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PostSubject: Re: Blueeyed   August 26th 2011, 1:32 pm

memphisbelle wrote:
Kelli, Brian sounds like so much fun and one of those people who light up a room.

Love the Cat in Hat costume and I have such a visual!

Thanks everyone! I love talking about him. I can't help but laugh at the crazy things he did or said. He was very unique and lit up a room. He was one of those kids that stood out, for good or bad.

Here's another funny one that just shows how Brian lived life to the fullest without caring what anyone else thought or said.

I won 4 tickets through the radio for the Harlem Globetrotters. They were giving tickets away all week long and on Friday they drew one lucky winner who would be sitting on the bench with the Globetrotters. Luckily, I won the grand prize.

My Dad decided to take my son Brian and my 2 nephews to the game. My Dad sat in the bleachers while Brian sat down with the team. Of course, the Globetrotters were being silly the entire game.

Anyway, during the game, they played lots of great music. My "not so shy son" decided to dance during the good music. He just didn't dance in his chair, he stood up in front of the few thousand people there and danced, facing the crowd. They loved it. (wish I would have been there!!) He also did the macarena.

Anyway, the next day, Brian talked me into bringing him McDonalds for lunch. He was in middle school at the time. His principal made his way towards me and I immediately though, oh hell, what's he done now. The principal said he had heard stories about Brian's performance the night before (lots of teachers and other students were in the crowd). LOL I said, oh lord. He loved the fact that Brian was who he claimed to be. He wasn't hiding anything. I said, well it would be nice if we could turn him off when he entered the school building. He told me he would much rather have a school full of Brians where he knew their name, rather than kids who never get in trouble and glide through without noticing they are there.

The principal had a really good point and from then on, I was careful not to try and tame Brian's crazy side too much. I did set limits though, not that he always listened to me. lol He was definitely his own person.
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PostSubject: Re: Blueeyed   August 26th 2011, 1:49 pm

Brian had star quality. He loved people and they knew it. I bet the Globetrotters loved him - they all have that same showmanship.

I love outgoing fun personalities, I am sure he had loads of friends.
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PostSubject: Re: Blueeyed   August 26th 2011, 5:28 pm

Kelli, I am reading your Brian stories with such a smile on my face. He would have fit right in with my crowd of kids and their friends. I'm guessing he was often the life of the party!

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PostSubject: Re: Blueeyed   August 26th 2011, 5:50 pm

I'm enjoying reading about Brian Kelli. He sounds like he enjoyed a spirited view of life and took pleasure in bringing that joy to others. I hope it brings you comfort to recall all the little joys you shared.
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PostSubject: Re: Blueeyed   August 26th 2011, 8:57 pm

Kelli, your Brian was absolutely adorable, what a cutie! That smile is friggin gorgeous. I love the thought of tie-dyed soccer shoes that is so awesome! Reading this made me smile and remember what is important, not my BB heartbreak. Thank you for sharing

Blue xxoo

p.s. totally off topic and forgive me, but gluedtothepc, your signature is a masterpiece and I want to marry it

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PostSubject: Re: Blueeyed   August 26th 2011, 9:20 pm

Hug wrap up in arms What a fantastic young man! Thank you for sharing your precious memories with us Kelli.
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PostSubject: Re: Blueeyed   August 27th 2011, 12:46 am

RealityRealmer wrote:
p.s. totally off topic and forgive me, but gluedtothepc, your signature is a masterpiece and I want to marry it

When jessicajules posted the pic in the Rachel thread, I knew it needed some continued exposure...the Rachel death stare is pretty fantastic. Very Happy


And while I'm at it... ((((blueeyed))))

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PostSubject: Re: Blueeyed   August 27th 2011, 1:16 am

Thanks for letting me share and thanks for all the love and compassion. You all are the best!!!

I have alot more photos on my facebook page if anyone wants to see them. http://www.facebook.com/#!/Kelli351
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PostSubject: Re: Blueeyed   August 27th 2011, 2:25 am

Thank you all, you are all wonderful people. Its hard right now to see thru my sorrow, but Daniel was the most wonderful joy I ever imagined. He took care of me as much as I took care of him. He touched so many lives, I had no idea. There were so many people at his memorial service I was overwhelmed.

I'm sorry, I'm trying to remember some funny incident (there are so many) but right now I just miss his face, his curly mess of hair and his backward baseball cap.

The light I have found is that there truly is kindness left in the world. So many people have been incredibly kind, giving and loving, I thought all the kind people were gone.
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PostSubject: Re: Blueeyed   August 27th 2011, 4:38 am

blueeyed wrote:
Thank you all, you are all wonderful people. Its hard right now to see thru my sorrow, but Daniel was the most wonderful joy I ever imagined. He took care of me as much as I took care of him. He touched so many lives, I had no idea. There were so many people at his memorial service I was overwhelmed.

I'm sorry, I'm trying to remember some funny incident (there are so many) but right now I just miss his face, his curly mess of hair and his backward baseball cap.

The light I have found is that there truly is kindness left in the world. So many people have been incredibly kind, giving and loving, I thought all the kind people were gone.

Please let us know if there is anything you need or any way we can help you.
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PostSubject: Re: Blueeyed   August 27th 2011, 5:09 am

blueeyed wrote:
Thank you all, you are all wonderful people. Its hard right now to see thru my sorrow, but Daniel was the most wonderful joy I ever imagined. He took care of me as much as I took care of him. He touched so many lives, I had no idea. There were so many people at his memorial service I was overwhelmed.

I'm sorry, I'm trying to remember some funny incident (there are so many) but right now I just miss his face, his curly mess of hair and his backward baseball cap.

The light I have found is that there truly is kindness left in the world. So many people have been incredibly kind, giving and loving, I thought all the kind people were gone.

Daniel sounds like such a wonderful son to you and such an awesome person who is loved by so many. You are blessed to have such a special son who obviously loves his Mom very much.

I hope to get a chance to talk to you this weekend, if you feel up to it. Sending continued hugs your way.

Hug wrap up in arms
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PostSubject: Re: Blueeyed   August 27th 2011, 9:51 am

I just never know what to say to any of you. I can't even fathom that kind of pain. I can only say that I'm so very sorry and like Nancy said, if there's anything we can do to help, we're here for you.

blue, I do hope that you and Kelli can talk soon, it really does help to talk with someone who can relate and knows exactly the kind of pain you are in.

Hug wrap up in arms
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PostSubject: Re: Blueeyed   August 27th 2011, 10:04 am

((((((((((((blueeyed))))))))))))))

your post, I cried, it just touched me so much. What sustains me every day is the kindness that people show, especially the little things. The dms, pms, emails I get if some notice I have not been on line. Just to say, I miss you, how are you. And that is just from here. I know my friends and family are there, but it is the people that don't have to, I don't expect, that reach out that gets to me. It has amazed me how much the little things count.
I am so glad to hear that you have had the same thing happen to you. That people are surrounding you with loving , giving and kindness.

My touble pales next to yours, as a mom, I just can not imagine. Even as I type this, I think should I share my stuff? Am I saying the right thing? I am going to risk it and just share what I feel. Please keep anything that helps and ignore the rest.
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PostSubject: Re: Blueeyed   August 27th 2011, 10:09 am

Sorry to hear of your loss.
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PostSubject: Re: Blueeyed   August 27th 2011, 11:21 am

KelliM, thank you for sharing Brian's story. He sounds absolutely incredible. Hug wrap up in arms

Blue, I've always felt your love for Daniel and I know he was well loved and an amazing young man. Thank you for sharing what you can. group hug

This thread is a reminder of what really matters.
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PostSubject: Re: Blueeyed   August 27th 2011, 3:07 pm

I didn't notice this thread until now. This is every parent's worst fear. So very sorry to hear of your loss, Blueeyed. I've lived through some losses myself and I know how you feel. It's hard to believe right now, but it will get easier with time.
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PostSubject: Re: Blueeyed   August 28th 2011, 1:52 am

I have spent my first day and night at home. I'm sad as hell, and exhausted but am proud of myself for being able to be here. Some of Dan's friends came over today just to hang-out in the game room (3rd bedroom) where they would just hang and play xbox. It was hard because I just wanted to be left alone, but in the long run I think it helped. So far, so good. Tomorrow I think I'm going to get up early and get out and about.
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PostSubject: Re: Blueeyed   August 28th 2011, 2:39 am

I'm happy that Dan's friends came over today. I hope it helped just a little bit and I'm glad that they were there for you. I am continuing to hold you in my thoughts blueeyed.


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PostSubject: Re: Blueeyed   August 28th 2011, 2:54 am

blueeyed wrote:
I have spent my first day and night at home. I'm sad as hell, and exhausted but am proud of myself for being able to be here. Some of Dan's friends came over today just to hang-out in the game room (3rd bedroom) where they would just hang and play xbox. It was hard because I just wanted to be left alone, but in the long run I think it helped. So far, so good. Tomorrow I think I'm going to get up early and get out and about.

I'm so glad his friends are there for you and I'm proud of you for surviving your first day and night at home!!!

Thanks for checking in with us!!! Hug wrap up in arms
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